We are so excited to have Colleen Guest Posting for us today. She is talking to us about a topic that has not been discussed much on our blog-- but a great reminder that we SHOULD discuss it. Thanks for sharing, Colleen!
Hello friends of Natural Nesters! My name is Colleen and I write over at The Chocolate Mile, where I ramble about losing weight, running and life. Things I don't write about; crafting, party planning, or cooking- so you may be wondering what I am doing here. Well, like the two lovely ladies of this site, and probably many of you, I live with my soul mate.
But we aren't married.
And it's not a top priority for us.
I know. This is usually where people either, stare blankly, or start asking questions.
3 years ago
Patrick and I have been officially in a relationship for 1,083 days (2 years, 11 months and 18 days). We've lived together for 782 days. So, essentially, we moved in with each other 4 days before our 8 month anniversary.
About.... 1.5 years in we realized that may have been a little fast, but it was too late to change it!
Living with someone is a hard task. Whether you're married or not, you're doing the same thing, except with one you have a piece of paper that says you aren't living in sin.
Living together for this amount of time has given us exactly 782 days to learn each others habits, learn how to mesh both of our ideas and morals of life together, and also learn how to not kill each other when the urge strikes.
I always laugh to myself when someone tells me they're moving in with their significant other and that they imagine it is 100% going to be wonderful. I hate to be the bubble buster, but it's not, on the bright side; those times that it's not all sundae-with-a-cherry-on-top special, are the times that are used to learn about each other and learn to love each other more in the end.
Some of the biggest struggles we've overcome in our house are things that sounds super easy, that's because, at least for us, we both have super easy solutions, that don't match what the other person is thinking.
- dishes- oh.my.god.
- not leaving socks in the couch
- alarm clocks
- healthy eating
We both have full time jobs, we both try to live active lives, I go to school, and we both want social lives (with each other and friends).
So, things we've learned:
you can take notes if you want, but, ya know, we aren't pro's.
- Listen; even if you don't want to hear it.
- Clean, even if it's not your mess, just take 10 minutes to clean it up
- Divide chores. He does laundry, I do dishes, the rest is fair game
- Talk about food, make a grocery list together, plan meals that you both like
- Plan date nights
- If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all.
Now, every couple is different, and so every couple is going to have their own problems, their own dilemmas. But I don't have to go into that, right? We're all adults. Weshouldknow that every one has different DNA. Man, I hope so.
Basically, we're lucky, because even with our problems- big and small (I want a new comforter, he is still attached to his bachelor pad bedroom furnishings), we love each other so it all works out. If the small problems didn't end with kisses and love notes we would have a much larger issue.
The other thing that I always like to remember is this:
We are still in the beginning of our relationship. That makes sense, right? I know for a lot of people who are dating, 3 years should be middle or close to the end, but since we don't discuss marriage or anything, we're still in the beginning. Our relationship is being built to ideally last until we're 97 years old. It's like we're building a house, we built a foundation, we built a structure, we're weatherizing and doing all that fun stuff- I know nothing about building a house- and then someday we'll get a pool, add an addition and so on.
Colleen is the warm hearted, fun having, sassy writer of The Chocolate Mile. She goes by Colleen, Coll, or Hey Kid. She has a bad addiction to coffee and requires a piece of chocolate every morning. She doesn't believe in dieting, but instead, in lifestyle changes.
Let’s be friends! You can follow me…
On the right hand side of my blog!
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